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Jeg skrev dette fordi jeg vet ikke hvorfor. Håper det faller i smak for noen av dere. Skrev på engelsk fordi det er lettere, eller no'.

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There I stood again, hands shaking with fear of what I was about to do. I had thought it through, played out the situation in my head numerous times. Mental preparation is important, lest one wants to come out of the situation badly burned. This sort of thing never had been in my nature; the plans had been made before, but were acted upon. I could feel it: this would be the game changer, the moment that forever would be remembered, perhaps even cherished in future generations memories - provided memory extracting technology is available in the future, of course. One last swallow, one last clearing of the throat and I was ready - it was go time.

I grabbed the chocolate with bits of fruit and nuts, something I had spent the last fifteen minutes deciding on. Surely a sight to behold - a man who was so indecisive that he spent a quarter of an hour on deciding on which carb-laden treat he would stuff his face with. Well, I was known in my group of friends as 'One-Two', short for One-Two-Punch. I insist that the explanation is linked to my indecisiveness as soon as I get more than two things to choose from, while they are adamant that a fight, which resulted in me being knocked out on the first jab, is the source of the name. Either way I was ready to take the final strides over to the counter, to shoot out quips about how it sure is hard to choose when there is so much deliciousness on display, but a spanner popped up and threw itself into my plans - in the form of a couple doing late-night shopping. This was very much not part of my plan. I had monitored the amount of customers that entered and left the store, to ensure that I had enough time to unload my quips, but they had entered the store in a way that avoided my field of vision. The cute cashier had stopped cleaning the counter on the other side of the aisle, indicating that she would beep my chocolate and ask if I wanted the receipt, as if I wanted to remind myself of the horrible failure that was about to unfold in front of my eyes.

I hesitated for a few seconds, tried to look as if I forgot something, but considering I had stood in the same place so long, it could come off as weird to turn around at this point. Additionally, the amount of money I had brought was just enough for the chocolate. It seems like my plan was not as well thought out as I previously believed. The couple closed in on my position, with shopping baskets full of fruit, vegetables, and other assorted healthy items. Not only would they want to get out of the store quickly, as it was late in the evening, but their larger amount of wares also suggested that I couldn't execute my small-talking, quip lashing, smarty-pantsing in an amount of time that I would deem acceptable. I took a medium sized breath and began my stride. I considered letting the couple go first, which would prove to the cashier how nice I was - unfortunately I was the one with only a bar of chocolate, and they were the ones with a large haul, making that move come off as weird as well. There was little I could do about what was unfolding, so I resigned to my fate.

I extended my arm and dropped the chocolate bar on the counter. I looked at the cashier, - whose name is Cassandra, by the way - she looked at me. I cleared my throat and readied my quip-nami. Like any person knows the correct way to start a quipquake is to open with a greeter, like 'hello' or 'howdy'. I had decided that 'Hello there' would be the adequate initiation for this brief meeting. I opened my mouth and got as far as 'hello t-' before she interrupted me by also saying "Hello". The awkwardness of us both saying 'hello' at the same time stopped me dead in my tracks. The quip factory had a 'no-awkwardness unless initiated by you' policy and that single clause had been broken. My mouth had been abruptly sewn shut, with air being the only thing coming out of my mouth.

"Well, shit" I thought, "everything's gone to shit now". Cassandra beeped my chocolate and put it in front of me, as if to imply that I made the wrong choice. I had not handed over the money yet, there was still time to reset the plan. I could excuse myself and say "Oh sorry, I've changed my mind. I don't really feel like fruit nut chocolate actually - today is more of a dark chocolate day. I'll just put this back", but I had already spent so much time deciding on this that reversing the decision would certainly do more harm than any other move. I handed her the money, hesitating somewhat. She put it in the cash register and plucked out the change. The point of no return had arrived, and zero quip missiles had been fired. I held out my hand sheepishly and felt the weight of failure, along with my coins of small denomination, weighing down my soul like a thousand anvils. As a last wound salting she asked if I wanted the receipt. I said "No". The quip factory was still closed it seems. I grabbed my chocolate bar and left the store. Normally I would have departed with a "goodbye" but the couple behind me had already been greeted by Cassandra, and the chance of being ignored was too big. Defeats are to be taken in stride, and therefore, I power on - considering this failure a learning experience.
Daylight come and we wanna go home.
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Man trenger sjeldent noe god grunn til å skrive noe. Plutselig kommer ordene som perler på en snor. Flott skrevet.
"But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer."
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